The map is not the territory!

The map is not the territory?
I took a long time to work that one out when I did my NLP Practitioner training.
For a start I've always been very comfortable with maps "so why should anyone else have problems?"  was my reaction. Navigation is a straightforward exercise. I instinctively know my east from my west and I've always followed those instincts whenever needing direction - whether in a big city at home or on holiday in a dusty hire car.
Of course there was the one exception when I drove from Lake Garda to Milan some 6 years ago. 

I left Garda and drove south to join the A4 - my "hard-wired" mental map directing me that I should turn left and head east towards Milan and Venice. Now whilst Venice is indeed to the east - Milan is actually to the west.  And with Italian motorway junctions being a bit tricky it was easy not to notice that in following the Milan sign I'd turned right and was heading west. Later when returning from Milan and rejoining the A4 the first sign I see is Venice - my mind map says "not that way - head west away from Venice."   
It was as much denial as disbelief when I neared Turin. When a helpful local insisted I must turn around and drive back my mind wouldn't accept.  Even the Dolomites to my left was not "mountain of evidence" enough to convince me that I was travelling east not west.  Bardolino is only a short distance up the east side of Lake Garda. When I finally hit the lake - which inexplicably had now shifted south of the A4 - I chose to drive round it's entire west, north and east sides before reaching Bardolino from the "wrong end??"
That "mind freaking experience" of 6 years ago prompted understandable curiosity in an article published recently in Current Directions in Psychological Science which covers our capacity to orientate ourselves.
Dealing particularly with architecture and the layout of buildings it explains how the mind builds a cognitive map as you enter a new building. It creates a layout of objects and shapes which we then use to navigate our way back out as we leave and back in when we revisit. Apparently, what the mind doesn't do very well is store a record of the route we took - that  sequence of left and right turns that we made. 

Now that very much explains a problem I have when asked to remember directions that are coded in the format: "1st left ...2nd right ...4th on the right."  Forget it! Because I will.
My processing preference is definitely for recognizable landmarks: "left by the park ....right at McDonalds ....and right by the Ford dealers."
There are some inevitable parallels that we can make here with the ways in which we communicate with others and attempt to influence their thinking.
You will have built your own "mental layouts" of knowledge and experience of - well pretty much everything really. The way you encountered situations and stored the parts became your map.
Now your map it isn't going to be wildly different from other peoples but different nonetheless.
So at the simplest level of communication - if for example you're wanting something done and you assume understanding and don't check - you'll probably not get the job done as you'd hope.
At a more extreme level when you're putting people under some pressure - like overselling ideas or being demanding then there is a very good chance that you and the other party are going to be in two different places altogether - like Turin when it should be Garda!

Get working on that inner self

Listening to the radio yesterday and hearing some 'phone in requests I realised how naturally humble we tend to be!
"I'd just like to say...." "I'd just like to ask..."
And it's the same when somebody receives an award or is invited to make an impromtu speech at a leaving do or something like it.
"I'd just like to thank..." "I'd just like to mention..."
Listen to us!  What is it that we're really saying?
"Forgive the intrusion ...this won't take long I'll just be a few minutes?
"I'm not worthy of this attention that I'm attracting to myself?
"Whatever I say I know it'll be rubbish so I'll lower your expectations now!"

I reckon it's one of those cultural things that history has blessed or cursed us with. Whether we're a product of the forelock touching toiling class or the stiff upper-lipped landed gentry. Who can say? 
Certainly not me I dropped history in the 2nd year at school.
But what I will say is that such a simple phrase as "just like to" - together with the inevitable excusatory voice tone and body language has a powerfully negative effect on the message that we communicate.
And it's this devlish thing called sub-conscious communication at work again. That cunning second channel into the other parties mind that is so sensitive to auditory and visual signals. To the extent that it can undermine and over-ride the words travelling in via the conscious channel.
My colleague Julie at career change specialists Churchill Brook talked recently about candidate performance at interview. She highlighted how candidates who were currently employed displayed significantly more confidence and presence than candidates who were not working - and of course how this influences the outcome of interviews.
How we outwardly express ourselves through our non-verbal language is of course an outcome of the way we inwardly feel. But it seems that few of us recognise this and take steps before an important presentation or interview to prime our inner self.
There are several simple and highly effective "inner-self workouts" you can try such as affirmations, visualisation and reframing - the link will tell you more about them.
But also ask yourself how thoroughly you plan and prepare for that interview or presentation. Go on be honest - do you tell people that you're good on your feet or better when spontaneous? Yeah right!!
When you are clear about the specific outcomes you want to achieve - and equally clear about the steps you will take to achieve that outcome - then you effectively create for yourself a flight plan.
Now you know where you're going and how you're getting there.
You are confidently able to direct things - and it shows!

For more tips and advice visit http://persuadability.co.uk  

Men really are from Mars!!

Why is it blokes can't read body language?
Now it's not that I was eavesdropping ...but you know how it is in Costa with the tables being so up close and personal! 
I'd have said they were meeting for the first time? It's usually the case when you see couples showing exaggerated interest in the mundane background stuff they chat about.  And it was  going very well.  Leaning forward ...faces cradled in hands - they were mirroring in perfect rapport. Big smiles. Tentative touching when they got up to order seconds - yes definitely must have been a first date.
Then I heard him say that he still lived with his parents!

Her smile went. The voice lost its happy ring. Hands dropped into her lap as she sat back in her chair locking her feet together under her chair. "Is that mine?" she asked - turning her attention to the toasty with a suddenly acquired interest in moving things along.
He of course hadn't noticed a thing! He happily continued - leaning in and going on with the same hyper-enthusiam. Whilst she - now fully out of rapport - was visibly  backing away from this "alien" from another world. This person whose body language was saying "yes" when her's was definitely saying "no!"
Because it isn't just words that consciously register and suggest disagreement.
More telling is the non-verbal language that unconsciously registers and confirms disagreement!
What I was observing does of course go on everyday in both both personal and business relationships. Even in telephone conversations

The daft thing is that most of the time we are actually trying to behave in the right way.  As an illustration of this picture the scenario:
Angry customer telephoning customer services: "That TV you installed isn't working. It cost £700 and I'm missing the cup final!"
Customer Service Agent #1 with a doubting tone says: "I am surprised. I'm sure there can't be anything seriously wrong with one of our new state of the art LCD HD sets"
Fair answer but wrong answer. The customer wants empathy not questioning of his complaint. Sensing no sympathy for how he feels, he demands his money back.
Customer Service Agent #2 with an angry disappointed tone says:  "Really!! That is not good! We need to quickly sort this out for you."
Good answer and right answer. The customer senses a likeminded response. They're in rapport and he is happy to be talked through the set up steps as the agent now shifts into calm problem solving manner.
This is pacing and leading at work. Matching the non-verbal language as it reflects the mood  and rhetoric of somebody before using it to lead them out of conflict and into resolution.
Yes our friend at Costa's needs to learn to mirror the "state we don't want to be in" language of his friend and lead her out of it - otherwise he'll always be living with his mum.

For more tips on persuasion go to http://www.persuadability.co.uk/

Allow people to persuade themselves

I talked in the previous post about the "ying and yang of persuasion." And about borrowing the soft hands techniques of Tai Chi - where you use the force of an opponents argument to your advantage.
Allowing somebody to persuade themselves towards the outcome you want is undoubtably the best form of persuasion. I'm convinced of it - it's what I've been observing in business for over 40 years.

I first consciously applied it in sales. Not as a salesman but as an Area Sales Manager - the best job there is in which to learn and practice influence and persuasion. Because it exposes you to situations every day: Sitting in on a sales interview where with a coach's 3rd party perspective you see and feel so much more than when you're actually doing the selling.  And as a Manager and coach - encouraging people with different needs and personalities to meet team goals and standards.
 Generally speaking people don't want to be told what to do.  And that is definitely the case if you suggest that what they're doing isn't good enough.  So launching in with a direct "I think this is what you should do" approach just doesn't work. You'll most probably get a defensive reaction. If you don't ...then the chances are you're being temporarily tolerated ...just for a quiet life. Once you're gone with no commitment made they revert to old ways and attitudes.
I was reminded of all this when catching up with one of the old team from those early days and we talked about the success of the team and in particular the dynamics of area meetings.

Apart from revelling in the flattery which was very enjoyable it was good to hear how he had taken on board and applied the same approach in his subsequently successful career:
At meetings he would establish and agree the team goal.
Then invite suggestions on tactics - and lead towards  consensus on the preferred tactic - which happened of course to be his choice too.
With ownership of tactics secure he would invite the first bids on individual targets and identify the predictable gap.
Then allow further debate to shapen up the tactics followed by further bids - knowing just as he had years previously that personal conviction plus a bit of self-esteem would ensure an achievable but stretching pledge would fill the gap!
Then he would confirm commitment - again remembering just how he would always achieve any target he'd agreed and committed to - and knowing full well that I would probably have settled for less! 

Use ying and yang to get agreement

I must get back into the routine of Tuesday evening Tai Chi.

The first hour is very well spent on the "health" aspects - practicing the moves and understanding the breathing and skeletal massage benefits.  
The second hour our teacher Bernie gets us on the martial arts stuff - that is great fun.
Not necessarily the diving forward rolls onto a mat - that makes me giddy! Nor the stamina building routines - holding weights and swinging your arms at shoulder height for several painful minutes.  Nor is it necessarily the sparring with the gloves on - its a nose protector not gum shield that I need!  But Bernie explains that "you need this stuff just in case it kicks off outside the chippy on a Saturday night!"
The part I get the biggest kick out of is the pushing hands practice. Embodying one of Tai Chi's key principals of using your opponents force to your advantage - it teaches you to be alert and sensitive to their imminent movement and then to allow their own attacking momentum to unbalance them. Initiate the attack yourself and you end up on all fours!

It's a principal that I find serves us very well in resolving conflict or when influencing opinions towards our own point of view.
Disappointingly we are inclined to counter-attack when our opinions are challenged. Which is fine if you just want to enjoy a good row but not very productive if agreement is the end aim.
And an attack can be very innocent in it's intent. Simply saying "you're wrong!" "that's not the case!" "I disagree!" signals a difference which in turn means that you're on opposite sides. And the shields go up.
We have our own "soft hands" that we can use to counter disagreement:
Keep quiet - listen intently - don't rush in with a response.
Nod your head in apparent agreement
Empathise with a response like: "fair point" "I think I can see why you say that"
Qualify their thoughts: "would you mind explaining it a bit more to me please?"
Qualify their feelings: "I see ...and why is that particularly important to you?"
Now - not only have you let them talk out their objection - deflate the balloon as it was once taught to me - but you know the needs and wants that sit behind their objection. You can tailor your response and make sure it meets those wants in every way.

Which is much better than a sore nose ...or falling on all fours 


For more tips on persuasion visit http://persuadability.co.uk/

Why do we love "Top 10 lists?

Why do we love "Top 10" lists so much?
What is so compelling about discovering "The top 10 ways of doing this!" or "The 12 greatest ways of doing that?"
Why is it that as a teenager I couldn't move from the radio when they were playing the latest Top 20 selling singles?
Or be fascinated by the list of most watched programmes around the TV regions? And delight in seeing that Ulster TV's favourite show was The Flintstones!
What persuades me to sit through a two hour TV programme on a topic of minor interest just to see how Channel 4 viewers counted their favourite bits down from 50 to number 1?
And while I'm about it - who was it who said that any article we write for the web has to be "the 6 top tips..." or "8 awesome ways...?" Where is the evidence for this unchallengable rule?
If not evidence, there is plenty of opinion about. I particularly like the offering from National Public Radio http://tinyurl.com/alhhp2 Their No 1 is Lists bring order to chaos. And they quote David Wallechinsky who co-authored the Book of Lists - talking about lists he says "lists help us in organising what is otherwise overwhelming." Spot on there mate!
The Montreal Observer's no 1 reason is They make us feel smart followed closely by They make us feel smug. Yes. have to agree with that too.
And Stuart Brown of Modern Life writing from the perspective of a blogger and article writer points out their obvious attraction - They are easy to digest!
I think that is a key point - digestability. Which is why I and many others ignore the rather ridiculous 100 hot hints or 50 finest findings.  Even 8 awesome ways may be stretching it a bit.
But with an eye or brevity I think lists or rankings are a brilliant aid when putting together a presentation or lengthy pitch.

• Lists help retain attention - telling the audience there are 5 compelling benefits you want to share conditions them to listen up for five chunks of information.
• They hold interest - positioning your list in a "saving the best until last" manner hooks the audience with curiosity - just like I get hooked by a two hour TV show!
• They have implicit authority - probably because our brains have become "Google'ised" to think this way - we just seem to accept that a list is definitive.

For good measure, qualifying your list with "based on proven demand" or "derived from research findings" makes it practicably irrefutable. And to be really on the money with your message why not assemble it into your own Top List of ...usefulness or ...value in the benefits? A simple e mail questionnaire or an hour or two on the telephone would do it for you.
So the next time you're mapping out those presentation key messages express them in a ranked list.  And get yourself into the No 1 slot!   

For more tips on persuasion visit http://persuadability.co.uk/  

The compelling power of a story

I've been reminded three times this week about the compelling power of stories:

Once by an item in the paper about the eye witness account by sail-maker Robert Hope at the Battle of Trafalgar in October 1805. Written in a letter to his brother he vividly describes moments like "when five more of the Enemy’s Ships came upon us and engage us upon every Quarter, for one hour and sixteen minutes. When one Struck but being so closely engaged that we could not take possession of her at that time. Two more seemed to be quite satisfied with what they had got so sheered off, but the other two, was determined to board us..." 
It's impossible to read his story and not be there seeing it through his eyes and experiencing the reality of it.
The second reminder came when reading Bill Bryson's - At Home. In the chapter The Kitchen he talks about food and he quotes from Tobias Smollett's The Expedition of Humphry Clinker. Referring to the vivid picture of life that Smollett paints in eighteenth-century England, Bryson illustrates this with the description of how milk was carried through London streets into which plopped "spittel, snot and tobacco quids from foot passengers, over-flowings from mud carts, spatterings from coach wheels, dirt and trash thrown in by roguish boys for the joke sake, the spewing of infants ...and finally, the vermin that drops from the rags of the nasty drab that vend this precious mixture." 
If I had simply been told that milk vending in 18th century England was unhygienic I wouldn't have understood quite so well!
And it is this experiencing it and therefore understanding it factor which is the magic that makes stories a compelling communication medium. And why story-telling should be in the tool box of anybody who has to regularly influence and motivate others.
Tips on how to create and tell a story are widely available. For a rapid master class read Mark Twain's How to tell a Great Story which is available as a free download. And read anything by Jeremy Clarkson. 
For my money the secret of storytelling - that magic ingredient that entrances the listener and gets them internalizing it - is vivid description. As was pointed out to me this week. Painting the picture in the listener's mind so they can see, hear, and feel the situation and the people - and be there with them.
So when you're putting together that story for your next presentation check it over for some of Hope's "every quarter for one hour and sixteen minutes" or Smollett's "spittel, snot and tobacco quids."
The third reminder? Oh yes. That was when listening to a compelling story on the radio.
It was on Womans Hour - so less said the better really! 
 
For more tips on persuasion browse the Resource Centre at http://www.persuadability.co.uk/ 

Put your tie on!

I watched the apprentice last night. It's a great show. And I think it was great to see all the blokes were wearing ties. It seems that appearance is something Lord Sugar takes seriously. And it was interesting that the chairman gave the evential fire'ee an early rebuke for not sitting at the boardroom table in the expected manner!

Of course many argue that the current trend to be tie-less is fine. In a Linkedin discussion group the very learned Chartered Management Institute are giving this topic more air time than any other - much to to the chagrin of the discussion group moderator!  
Early contributors show their support for open-necked business  - obviously they are leaders rather than followers -even adding the odd endorsement for jeans (designer of course) to show just how "trendy" they are. Latterly the traditionalists are fighting back. Defending all that is right in "appropriate dress."  I am of that persuasion. A belief no doubt instilled by many detentions at  St Clement-Danes GS for not wearing the mandatory school cap! And subsequently reaffirmed in my equally impressionable years as a sales trainee by Borden and Bussey's training film message to VIP your way in! 
But appearance does count.  As colleagues Keith (ex-army) and Carl discovered when requesting a testimonial from a newly acquired customer. Expecting some praise for their ethical selling style the lady explained that she was encouraged to buy by their clean shoes.
It was of course a post-rationale. The customer hadn't consciously inspected Keith and Carl's shoes before saying yes, but on reflection she realised this was the trigger.
Like most people she is sub-consciously influenced. Signals we don't even notice - especially visual ones - trigger a stored thought in our beliefs system and in turn affect how we make decisions.
And when those decisions involve somebody's recommendations we  intuitively ask questions about them and their values first - and the first answer we get back is from what we see.
So lads if we throw off the tie there's the dilemna:
Be consciously observed as "with it! ...modern ...innovative etc."
Or sub-consciously recognised as "inappropriately dressed" ....casual"  Or worst of all "a follower!"
So I'll be leaving off the leather overcoat and shades today!
Where's my white shirt and tie?

The curse of buyer's remorse

I filled up the Lexus this morning ready for a trip to London tomorrow. £70 ...ouch! 
Then I discovered the car wash was closed so it was back home ...out with the hose and sponge and be reminded of another reason why I've finally gone off the beast!

That evening 4 years ago I'd gone out intent on buying the IS200 model.  Then overcome by the smell of leather seating I found myself driving home in the indulgent GS300.  And I've been telling myself ever since that I made the right choice. 
Which apparently is a proven behavioural trait.  After we have made a choice we adjust our thinking to think better of the option we chose. It's been demonstrated in some research carried out by psychologists at University College London and Lake Forest College and published in Psychological Science.  Their study actually showed that we can rate two things equally, but once we've made a decision on one we subsequently convince ourselves it is superior. It seems we need to relieve the psychological tension of rejecting a perfectly reasonable alternative.
I certainly relate to that ...but my experience also tells me that eventually that other well known trait "Buyer's Remorse" will kick in ...just as it has with me and my GS300. And guess who I blame?   No not myself!  I blame the salesman ...of course! For allowing deep pile carpet and a  pneumatic drop down compartment for my shades to distract me!
Of course shifting a car off the forecourt may be a result in the used-car trade - but the majority of business situations have a more lasting consideration when it comes to buyer  satisfaction. And there's nothing like a lingering attack of buyer's remorse to turn a once happy customer into an ex-customer! 

Which is why I always worry about the lack of requalification and consolidation in selling interviews. These days most of us are quite good at identifying needs. Some of us are quite good at fully qualifying identified needs and underlying wants.  But from my observation, not many of us are good at requalifying and consolidating.

It's understandable. We've got the prospect nodding at our pitch. Why risk a rejection. Let's press for a close!  And make a short term win!

What do I mean by requalifying and consolidating?

•  Checking that they are happy! By asking questions as you present your ideas or benefits like "How does that sound?" or "How do you feel about that?"  "Are you happy with the solution we've discussed?" 
• Properly handling any objections ...to make sure that these and other concerns are resolved. With questions like: "Does that answer your question?" "Do you have any other concerns?" Adding in for good measure the so reassuring and effective  "Are you sure?"

Like it or not, customers are always right ...and they never forget!

Which is why I'm on the look out for a VW!

Men and women ...there is a difference.

A sofa discussion on Breakfast TV this morning got onto the question of political correctness and how it had changed over time. They were actually making the comparison between a couple of currently showing TV Detective programmes where one was set in the 60's.  Now the 60's was my "finishing" era as far as adolescence goes so I have to confess to once holding some  "dated" attitudes on the subject of men and women.
However in recent years I have championed the cause of women, particularly when it came to hiring and developing good sales people. My experience was that women just happened to excel at reading body language. So consequently they were better at mirroring and establishing rapport. Which meant they were better qualifyers ..and so on.

So it was an unbiased eye that was caught by reports on some work undertaken by the University of Southern California.

It seems that there are sex differences when it comes to recognising someone else's facial expression when we're stressed. For example us blokes don't respond to angry faces ...so they say.  Although I do think the expression "diminished brain activity" is a bit strong.  But it does seem that there is "decreased co-ordination" in the part that interprets what facial expressions are saying.

The trouble is that these experts now have the brain imaging technology to prove it!! As shown by another  team at University of Pennsylvania who have come up with more or less the same conclusions.    http://tinyurl.com/cymoan
And it seems in this case that when stress abounds in situations involving personal inter-action - like that key client negotiation - us guys are much more inclined to resort to the old fight or flight response. Sadly I must associate myself with those last remarks!
So lads we better brush up on those calming positive affirmations as well as the body language skills before that next big business pitch. Or else we're going to have to leave things to the ladies.
Still there is one comforting thought ...it's no longer politically incorrect to talk about the differences between the guys and the girls???

Whistle while you work and it will all happen!

Do you talk out loud to yourself?  A colleague in the next office frequently does ....to the extent he thought he may have a problem. I argued "of course not!" ...because I also happen to talk to myself a lot. So it was reassuring to read this week that a team of psychologists are backing me up. In a series of tests with volunteers at the University of Toronto the researchers looked at the influence of our "inner voice." That way we have of announcing and explaining to ourselves  something we're about to do. Like tackling self-assembly furniture or explaining to your partner that you're off for a golfing week-end when her mother is due to stay!
Apparently letting the inner voice out can make us more decisive and resolute, improve our self-control, and make us less likely to do things impulsively.
The same day I read about this, I came across another piece of research that showed how whistling while you work can be a huge help. Again I could relate with this concept as I'm sure many other happy whistlers will. It always fascinated me how my old window cleaner Ted would whistle this repetitive non-tune as he scampered up and down his ladder and across window cills with all the instinctive assurance of a mountain goat.

The scientific part of this story deals with our working memory ...kind of like the RAM in your computer. It seems that if we think to much about what we're doing we use up too much RAM and can lock up. Something else I can relate to!  On the other hand if what we need to do is hard-wired into our consciousness then we don't have to think about it ...just do it!
Both of these stories have a relevance to nerve wracking occasions we encounter in business. Like an important pitch or a key presentation. Neither should be "busked!" Something we are all guilty of at times when time pressures encourage us to believe that "I'm better when I'm spontaneous!" Yeah ...right!  Both should be properly planned and prepared and dare I say rehearsed. Then once learned and hard-wired we have to trust our inner self to deliver.
With a few words of encouragement ...or maybe a whistled non-tune!

 For more tips on persuasive communication visit http://www.persuadability.co.uk/

Be up front and honest with your sales pitch

"Never sell to a salesman!" So the saying goes ...and I'd add to that "...certainly not on the same day!"

The first attempt came through the letter box. One of those bells and whistles extravaganzas of direct mail from that well known subscription book.    I muttered something like "Blooming Rxxxxxx'x Dxxxxx!" and threw it back on the mat. But then I just had to open it up and view the contents  ...clearly  they had scored well on Attention and  Curiosity.  With so many goodies to investigate I felt immediately involved.  Clever display of the words "Time sensitive" ..."Official"  ..."Medically approved!" ..and "Free!" subliminally communicated  Limited availability ...Reassurance ... Reciprocity. They were getting through to me! Even an apparent handwritten letter from an ex-employee was thrown in to to press the Social Proof button. Yet despite more subliminal urging from the YES envelope ...the contents returned to the hall floor.

The second attempt came over the telephone. Friendly introduction of caller and company and successful attempts to pace me earnt them a point for Rapport. "We're carrying out a survey on media attitudes!" he said.  Yes I should have spotted the old "survey" line, but rapport was doing its stuff. And "media" triggered thoughts of recent correspondence with my MP about the News Corp and BSkyB merger ...so a simple Generalisation allowed me to misinterpret  what the caller meant.
When I subsequently found myself revealing my monthly spend on telephone and internet services the penny dropped. But a salesman has to encourage one of his own. And there was the question - do I lose face and admit I'd got it wrong when taking the call?  So I saw it out to the bitter end ...already thinking how I should reply when Sky or Virgin media inevitably call and tell me I had declared an interest in their services.
Such attempts to camouflage a pitch do of course ultimately back fire. Whether it's disappointment over raised expectations, irritation over timewasting, or annoyance at being mislead. Any of these reasons will prompt us to curtail the interview or cancel the order afterwards.
Which is why I've argued with sales colleagues over the years that upfront openness and honesty ...with its consequential state of trust and rapport is undoubtably the best policy.
It also corresponds with a life long belief that people prefer to buy ...not be sold to!
So whenever I get in front of a prospect I always start off with something like this:
"I believe what I have to talk about will certainly interest you ...but so that I can focus on the particular benefits that will be of interest ...would you mind if we first talk about  your needs."
I rarely encounter a prospect who doesn't respond well to this. I've certainly never met one who was happy to be duped into a sale!

 For more on tips persuasion visit http://persuadability.co.uk/

Presenting with spontaneous creativity!

I do not have a great memory!  I believe it to be quite large ...as you'd expect at my age! But my filing system and search facility or should that be faculty, are barely average on a good day. Unless of course we happen to be talking about acronyms! Then I just can't forget as these two favourites from way back on the CV illustrate:
Work Study Analysis (c1966):- 1:Select 2:Record 3:Examine 4:Develop 5:Install 6:Maintain.
...Rarely used now but unforgetable thanks to S.R.E.D.I.M.  
Kraft Foods Promo-Display Criteria (c1976):- Position + Impact + Message + Price + Ease of self-selection + Stock availabilty + Stability.    
...Of by-gone interest but forever inscribed through P.I.M.P.E.S.S.  
I don't know why my brain finds acronyms so powerful but I know it likes them and responds very well to them! I think it may have something to do with my left-brain right-brain balance?

 Which in my case suggests a leaning towards things of the left-side such as lists and logic, but also a "rightish" passion for imagination and day-dreaming. Something often mentioned in school reports.
This manifests itself in a particular way when I try to write a presentation or a training programme. Try as I might I cannot anticipate and write the content in full and final detail. Not a problem uniquely mine by any means ...a great proportion of people I work with face the same difficulty. When circumstances demand that I write a script in this manner I can guarantee that on delivery day I'll think of something a lot better to say. So the end result is that the script becomes a constraint.  That apart, there are often occasions when an informal talk is the order of the day and working from a script just isn't right. But if you're like me you'll still need a flight plan to fly by or there's no knowing where you'll end up or when!!
Is this sounding familiar? If it is and you're like me then try out this scriptwriting strategy:

1. Write your script out in the usual way. Sorry you're not getting away with it! Choose your style, set your objectives,  map out the key topics, and write the words. But don't worry about perfect grammar and spelling. This is just for you to read.
2. Read your script several times to yourself to hear the messages and their meaning and to get the timing right.
3. Identify KEYWORD(S) that relevantly describes each key message throughout the presentation.
4. Create an acronym from the Keywords.  Play around with them if you need to, to get acronym-friendly keywords.
5. Finally for reassurance and the visual confidence that this gives, list the Keywords with first letter in bold on a pocket-size card. Visualize the acronym on the card in your pocket.

So why do I think this works for me? I believe that my brain needs to lean on the orderliness of its left hemisphere to then allow itself confident free-rein into the creative right-side. Something that Tony Buzan discusses in his The Power of Creative Intelligence. 
So give this method a try and don't be surprised if it's the best presentation you ever made.


for more on persuasive communication visit http://persuadability.co.uk/

What really is the most important step in the sales process?

What is the most important step in the sales process? Well like I said three posts ago is has to be Qualification. Qualifying of needs, wants, underlying preferences and beliefs. However if the question had asked for the most important skill I would  have to say Handling Resistance would be an equal-first choice.

And I say that because as a persuasion skill we observe it every day in exchanges of opinion between: business colleagues, fellow travellers, TV talent show judges, football pundits, and critics of anything from art to books to cookery. Actually we don't see it so much as see the absence of it as "exchanges" descend into heated and often bad-tempered  disagreement!

When you step back and think about it ...it's not difficult to understand why this happens ...and with a little bit more thought how to avoid it.

The "bad" feeling happens because we don't like our opinions being dis-respected. And that's because our opinions all stem from our beliefs and values system ...something we are highly protective towards. After all much of it came from grannie

So I'm OK about you disagreeing with me ...but when you tell me that I'm "wrong to think that way" you instinctively trigger off an attack on my beliefs and values.
And it's not just saying it. You're involving my subconscious here. And it is hyper-sensitive to audio-visual signals. Which explains the instinctive trigger bit. So interrupting me ...a shaking head ...a dismissive tone of voice can all be such triggers.
Are you starting to get the picture? Right then, here are four good habits that will help avoid these problems and get more people agreeing with you:
Good habit No.1: Listen attentively and patiently. Let me hear and see that you're interested in what I'm saying. Encourage me to explain and elaborate.
Good habit No.2: Don't tell me that I'm wrong. You may think it but don't say it ...or show it!
Good habit No.3: Show respect for what I'm saying. Develop some natural sincere responses like: "Fair point" "I understand why you say that" "I can see why that's important to you."  Mutual respect is an essential pre-cursor to agreement. Start by showing me some.
Good habit No.4: An important part of the psychology this! Make me feel that rather than arguing with me you're actually discussing my doubts or concerns. Rephrase my statements (eg: "Telesales is a waste of time") into a question. "Yes you understandably question it's role Bob ...what are your main misgivings?" With these aired you're then able to align your points of view with them and move towards agreement.

I reckon (not researched!)  that disagreement is 80% bad communication and behaviour.  Letting somebody know that you respect their opinion, and implicit in that share their beliefs and values, sees you 80% of the way to gaining their agreement. 
Something that grannie would be very happy about! 

How do you pitch your idea quickly?

"How do you pitch your idea quickly?" That was a question that came out of a chat I was having yesterday with Jason, my digital designer buddy.  He was showing me his great designs for a new company logo at the time. We talked about presenting these to his co-MDs for agreement ...and got onto the general subject of pitching ideas.

There are a many issues to think about when putting a pitch together. Issues like:
Is it in response to a pre-qualified brief?
Is it a competitive pitch with a decision to come later ...so a "highly memorable" presentation is key?
Will a decision be made on the day and so should the style be more options based and participative?
Or is it a situation where a need has to be established as the first step.
That last scenario is what we see reflected in the classic advertising sequence Attention! Interest! Desire! Action!  ...etched in stone generations ago. And of course for any of us that served a traditional sales and marketing apprenticeships ...it would have been etched in our brains too! As was the 1975 upgrade "the 5 Part Brand Talk" which made Market! Product! Pack! Support! Profit!  unforgettable as an etched-in-my-brain Sales Talk template.
And unforgettability is the beauty of it! To have an embedded pattern around which you can pitch an idea or proposition ...when as occasionally happens you have to do it spontaneously.
What I love about this old favourite is that you can adapt it to suit whatever you're pitching:
Market: What is the proven opportunity or need?  What are its size or growth  characteristics that make it a must have? 
Product: What is the solution we're coming up with that meets that need? What makes it really special and says it will be a winner?
Pack: (keeping the anticipation going here) So what does it look like ...feel like ...sound like?  Let's get enthusiastic about the details and benefits ...experience the solution and understand why it's special!
Support (The reassurance part)  What is the research that proves it's a winner? What are we doing to "guarantee" a result?
Profit What will you get out of this? What is the financial ...people ...reputation value that this delivers?
Follow this Jason and it should be a piece of cake with the MDs!


For more on persuasion visit the Resource Centre at www.persuadability.co.uk

The "Concrete" base of persuasion

It was like one of those meetings that we have all been to. A group of "interested parties" trying to brief a design company on the key messages for our new marketing brochure.  And believing that we could quickly "knock them out" ...without any prior agreement on our proposition or our distinctive competence (preferred speak for USP.) Let alone a published mission statement ...or company vision and values. And adding to the challenge...it was with some  creative agency colleagues.  So we had a room full of clever minds ...excess testosterone ...and fierce desire to see one's own idea prevail.
As generally happens the MD and I got into a row! He was insisting that we should lead off with "service excellence." "But what does that mean?" I asked.  "What are you saying?" he retorted "...that we shouldn't want to offer service excellence...that's stupid!"  He "qualified" stupid in the way that he qualifies most words when being assertive.  Then as we do ...our exchanges deteriorated into moody mutterings ...all my persuasion skills having long since "crashed!"
 If only I had read Made to Stick ...and knew then what I know now about "Concrete" as the authors apply the term to making your message work. 
I would also have known the full and proper meaning of the word Abstract!    

But then I've always known what abstract means! It means abstract...like as in abstract art. You know! Modern. Not the real thing! 
And I guess that's the first problem the MD and I had, as do so many others when communicating - not sharing the same meaning of words.  But now that I do understand better the meaning of abstract ie: considered apart from concrete existence  I can see the other problem that we also had. When you discuss things in abstract terms it leaves too much vagueness for clear understanding. To achieve that, you must convert abstract terms into their concrete equivalents or constituents.
This is the point explained so well by Chip and Dan Heath in their book.  Illustrating this with several examples, my favourite deals with the challenge of raising grants to protect California's vast  environmentally critical areas.  Acreages or area percentages were abstract. The solution was to identify the key areas they wished to protect with the recognisable "concrete" term Landscapes.
My problem with "service excellence" was that it is too abstract. To influence prospective clients, "service excellence" needed to be translated into its concrete constituents such as "cost management" or "sustainable production" or "project communication."  Then the MD and I would have had some concrete terms we could recognise  ...evaluate ...and I'm  sure to ultimately agree on.
But at the time I didn't know what abstract meant.  Next time I'll do better!

For more on persuasion visit  http://persuadability.co.uk/

Which of these options would you prefer?

Do options encourage decision making?

Well it's something I've always believed since it was ingrained into me in my Sales Training Manager days at Kraft Foods.
We were taught and so in turn taught others to:  "Offer a choice between an in-cabinet promotional display of Dairylea or a dump bin." And more often than not we got one or the other. Always the innovator! I introduced the "options approach" when selling in large sizes of regular  stocked lines like Philadelphia in the then 8oz size. "Suggest to the store manager that with one size only customers have a 50% choice of saying yes. With two sizes the choice is small, large or no. So we're increasing the chance of a sale to 66%!"
To be honest our success with this line did surprise me! But it seems I was simply ahead of my time with my persuasion psychology.
Since then some serious research has looked at the issue of options and decision making. I was introduced to one in the excellent book "Made to Stick" by Dan and Chip Heath. They discuss work carried out by Psychologists Amos Tversky and Donald Redermeier into situations where the existence of choice affects how people make decisions.

In one example, students faced the choice between - going to the library to study or attending a lecture given by a famous author. 21% chose to study.
Another group of students was given the same choices and a 3rd option was  offered - to watch a foreign film you've been wanting to see. 40% chose to study. Suggesting that increasing the number of alternatives to the "responsible" option reinforced it as the choice that should be made.
Further insights into the impact of choices are currently available in a  fascinating presentation by psychologist Sheena Lyenger available on http://www.ted.com/.  She points out that different cultures respond in different ways to choice. Apparently Russians see a proliferation of soft drink brands as simply one choice of soda!   And she also makes the interesting assessment that too many options result in bad choices being made. 
Clearly no researchers are trying to mathematically model the probability of success based on numbers of options - apart from me that is!!! But when planning that next response to a business pitch ...as an option to the single solution  response why not work up two options? And ask them which one they prefer? You'll probably increase your odds of success!

For more on persuasion browse through the Resource Centre at http://persuadability.co.uk/

What is the most important step in the Sales Process?

"What is the most important step in the Sales Process?"
I love the questions that are pitched into the discussion groups on Linkedin.

And of course you can't resist offering an opinion...for a variety of motives:
- Genuine altruism from sharing "wisdom" with industry peers.
- Satisfaction when peer approval and agreement is bestowed on your opinion!
- Recognition as being a trend-savvy pundit if you get in early on a subsequently popular discussion.
All of which was in my mind when I posted my carefully considered answer:

"Happy to echo what most others are saying here. Yes it has to be the Qualification step with Rapport Building as its essential pre-cursory step. When prospects/clients etc feel that you really do understand their needs and share their values, and you maintain this state of rapport when discussing solutions and recommendations, then they will instinctively trust and believe in you and your ideas...."
And I absolutely do believe that. Based on the realisation over time that almost all of us do not enjoy being sold to. Because most of those that try are content to learn something about our needs, and then happily attempt to satisfy them... without any recognition or reference to the underlying values and wants that drive our needs.
And that "values referenced" approach is even more critical when seeking acceptance of change in opinion or behaviour in business and life. Persuading a colleague to happily change to another team, or enthusiastically embrace new practices  means finding reasons that align with their inner motivations.

Discussion Groups are of course exercises in persuasion.

We want buy-in to our views and opinions. Ironically, groups with Sales Professionals tend to go heavy on the weight of opinion rather than subtly with values recognition! Response number 370 kind of summed it up "Oh for heaven's sake. How is Trust part of the Sales process ...Does any body know of what a Sales Process consists?
Are well! I guess he like me didn't find his inner needs of peer approval and recognition were satisfied.
But then we should have remembered that you should never try and sell to a saleman!

For more on persuasion visit http://persuadability.co.uk Resouce Centre

Sell them the benefits!

"These are great. They used to be brand leader!" was the last ditch pitch from the stationery goods sales representative stood beside me in Goss's General Store. He offered Mrs Goss the card of ball-pens from his now empty sample bag. She remained indifferent ...and seized the opportunity to serve me as her excuse to close the sale.

I remember that lovely sales cameo from about 40 years ago. Today our friend the sales representative could have used a different story.
"Consumers prefer these because they're not brand leader!"
Well that is the case according to a new study in the Journal of Consumer Research. To be precise what they are telling us is that consumers do actually favour underdogs. It seems that it is part of our psyche to sympathise with a hero who has overcome a disadvantaged start compared to their adversary, and who triumphed because of a determination to beat the odds. Remember how we all felt about Leonardo di Caprio's character Jack in Titanic when he came up against Billy Zane?
In terms of market position it is something that Avis Car Rentals recognised almost 50 years ago. They were second behind Hertz and made a marketing virtue out of it...adopting the slogan "We try harder"

They make a positive persuasive statement to their customers that they should expect to be treated better with Avis.
Yet many of us in business do not follow the Avis lesson. Perhaps we believe it is better to pre-empt what we feel is a conspicuous weakness and confess that we are "a small company" or "quite new" or  "provincially located."
And then because language works at two levels... not only do we make the prospects see a concern that they probably didn't have ...but we also send a sub-conscious negative signal of our own lack of belief and determination.
So check out your own language. Are you making a virtue out of being "a responsive company" with "a fresh approach" and "free of expensive overheads.  
Time to be a hero in your business!

Cognitive dissonance did it for me!

Cognitive dissonance did it for me!

Yes I remember the date November 11 1996. That was the day I quit smoking. After the usual number of failed attempts and despite the discouragement of my puffing peers I finally did it. And the secret of ultimate success was seeing myself as somebody that just wasn't a smoker.

So I quickly related with a recent article in Science Daily reporting on a study carried out by Dr. Reuven Dar of Tel Aviv University's Department of Psychology which found that the intensity of cravings for cigarettes had more to do with the psychosocial element of smoking than with the physiological effects of nicotine as an addictive chemical.
In observations on in-flight attendants with limited opportunity to smoke and on religous Jews subject to a sabbath ban they found that both groups had low craving levels in situations where they expected not to smoke. For anyone that has ever smoked they would recognise that this is a pretty extreme illustration that our behaviour is formed by perception and belief. But it is the case... if I had been one of the flight attendants in the study and I smoked in flight then I would feel that my behaviour was at odds with what I believed to be right. Just like when I quit. I told myself that I was no longer a smoker. If I had a wavering moment I would have been experiencing cognitive dissonance ...the feeling of discomfort that results from holding two conflicting beliefs.
People tend to seek consistency in their beliefs and perceptions. In an often quoted study of misbehaving children it was shown that telling them that they were bad simply reinforced the bad behaviour. When told that they were good they ultimately corrected their bad behaviour because it was dissonant with being good.
All of us have deeply held beliefs. All of the choices that we make such as how we behave...to the kind of work we want to do....to the car we choose to drive are based on needs and wants that ultimately are derived from those deeply held beliefs. Anybody in sales will more than once in their career have encountered buyer's remorse and a cancelled sale. And probably dismissed the purchaser as a "time waster."
Truth is....if we are in the business of influencing others and we attempt this without regard for their beliefs and values then we shouldn't be surprised when we encounter some serious cognitive dissonance.